10 Essential Tips to Create a Successful Open Relationship: Agreements

Jun 14

These are some suggestions for navigating open relationships with confidence and harmony. Just like individuals and relationships are diverse, each non-monogamous relationship’s agreement is unique and diverse. Some of the pillars to co-construct thriving relationships are self-awareness, open communication, nurturing your relationship, and establishing clear boundaries.

Make Your Relationship a Priority: Learn to prioritize your intimate and sexual connection, understanding that an open relationship should not be a quick fix for existing relationship issues. Dedicate time to nurture and strengthen your bond.
Foster Open Communication: Negotiate and discuss your terms openly, ensuring that your relationship's foundation is strong enough to support an open arrangement. Reflect on your individual and collective emotional security before embarking on this journey.
Embrace Long-Term Intimacy: Recognize that sexual experiences with a long-term partner differ from casual encounters. Appreciate the unique aspects of long-term intimacy, such as familiarity and deeper emotional connection, without comparing them to new experiences.
Discuss Boundaries: Decide together how much information you want to share about your encounters. Find a balance that respects both partners' comfort levels, whether it involves sharing explicit details or maintaining privacy.
Define Sacred Spaces: Determine where it's acceptable to engage with others, such as avoiding bringing new partners into your shared living space or designating certain locations as off-limits.
Establish Frequency Guidelines: Clarify the frequency of engaging with others outside of your relationship. Whether it's a one-time occurrence, weekends only, or during specific circumstances, be explicit about your expectations.
Consider Strangers or Friends: Discuss preferences regarding encounters with acquaintances or strangers versus engaging with friends. Respect each other's comfort levels and establish guidelines accordingly.
Embrace Trial Periods: While respecting your agreed-upon boundaries, remember that the terms of your open relationship are not set in stone. Be open to reassessing and discussing adjustments if something isn't working. Open and honest communication is crucial for a fulfilling experience.
Follow safe sex guidelines: Out of respect for yourself, your partner, and others you might engage with, follow safe sex guidelines. You can find some suggestions for safer sex here.
Challenges: Be open to challenges. Opening your relationship can bring up things you didn’t know were there. Keep your communication open and honest throughout the whole process. Remember that consent is an ongoing process, not a one-time “yes” or “no”.
Explore what you want, why, and how. Work together to set the parameters of your agreement. Opening your relationship can be a wonderful thing, but it may also be painful. Carefully exploring your wants and needs and crafting an agreement that works for all is essential in making an open relationship a success.